Most times I am weak at the knees

when I’m seduced by your eyes,

other times your lies

just hit me in the guts.

I thought the truth was out there

but it got mixed up

with your fingers wrapped up in my hair.

I squeezed my eyes tight

my insides wet and open for you

schoolgirl crush in all its height

scared of scratched up back seats

techno beats

grab my ass in public

pull down my bra

forget hotels and bars

your bursting ego

and my soiled view of love.

I always think you’ve left me

but then you walk right back in

with your macho ways

and cool shades.

I envy your pride

wish I could sleep there for a while

rub your hands on my skin

and evoke all my drownings

my dark ages surroundings

ancient scrolls in drawers

tiny pots of liquid sin

drapped around this cut up heart

you drive by

and stop for a coffee

but I srick around

for more punches

in my gut

to feel something

besides emptiness.

No love will ever fill my cup.