Anais Nin

We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospect.

-Anais Nin

Born on this day in 1903.

She is and will always be one of my favourite writers. Her journals are brilliant. She makes me feel as if I am not alone as an artist and a woman.

Celebrate #feminism and being a writer.

Thank you for all your support and encouragement.

I took this photo last week when I was swanky.

#selfie for @jwprebich @authordkollat @dstudioarts @catederham

Thanks for tags.

Tagging you to show me your favourite quote.

#quoteoftheday #anaisnin #anaisninquotes #christinastrigas #poetry #journalwriting

From my Instagram post

https://instagram.com/p/BfeyzpulN2_/

Poets sleep awake

Photo by @dan_cretu from Instagram

 

I need my naps

I am a modern poet

in semi-deep sleep

never fully awake

dreaming about pre-raphaelites and the Rosettis

still thinking

in all the colors

you left behind.

I hug you close

yet you disappear

into orange clouds

and sunset lawns.

I want to forget

the long trails

to your heart

and climb up

your mountain

to kiss your eyes

to sleep.

Alas, I slumber awake.

Awake, yet not.

Stay beautiful and strong

Featured Image -- 6242Stay beautiful and strong

when others try to break

your soul, it’s not you

they want, it’s your beauty and art.

Some people create friendships

to bully you, steal your man,

betray your wife. Some people

want to catch you weak

and vulnerable to spread it

on the evening news. The

only way to love is by blocking off

negative energy

focus on your art.

People will either love you

or hate you

and if you are really talented

if you have a gift

they hate you even more.

It’s too easy to kill a spirit these days

with group chats instead of mobs

with tweets instead of telephone wires.

It is as if people have lost the ability

to be compassionate

and only care for attention

seeking out the evil

perpetuating hatred

jealousy through harassment.

The sad part is most of these

people I have witnessed doing this

are women. If you want to get your

power back, this is not the way

to do it. It sickens me. And for this

my heart gets broken

I feel too much and I would rather

not.

International Women’s Day

To the beautiful women who I read and who inspire me daily, thank you. I admire your strength through words and images. Celebrate being a woman and surround yourself with people who love you and encourage you. Kick toxicity out. Bring in love and acceptance.

If you know anything about me then you know that I read and write daily. I find the poets who I have read for decades are always the ones who inspire me, but some modern poets are breaking through into my heart. I am picky and critical when it comes to poetry, I am in love with the ideals behind it and less with the stigma of it. I have discovered some phenomenal women poets who have inspired me lately, Sharon Olds, Joumana Haddad, Mary Oliver, Dorothea Lasky, Clementine Von Radics, Sarah Howe, Lang Leav, Natasha Head, Warsan Shire, Sarah Kay, Yrsa Daley-Ward, Amber Tamblyn, Melissa Bull, Julie Bruck, April Green, Rupi Kaur, to name a few whose poetry books I connected with on a humane and spiritual level.

Thank you for reading. Please leave a comment as to the women who inspire you.

Water Under the Bridge

I thought maybe you were different

but anybody can say anything with conviction

tell you that you are the most beautiful

the most talented poet

that your words speak to my soul

and everything you never believed in

becomes some ethereal proof.

There is not enough

water under the bridge

to forget how her lies

twisted me up

and left me vomiting up my guts

on words, on hatred

on putrid ideologies

of muses that do not exist.

I give too much benefit of the doubt

when I am not even a lawyer.

She can eat you up and spit you out

a lover,

she can see how a and b equals

her own fucked up perceptions,

the people I once loved

still love me back,

still want me,

ask to be forgiven at funeral parlors

through silent texts,

by changing how their darkness

strengthened their light.

But no need to search for you  anymore,

download any app you want

you will never see my name there again,

for

someone who is toxic

someone who is a devil in disguise of an angel

is the fruit that spoils.

Change your name again

create a multitude of accounts

I am  still me

one account

one love

no one can break through again.

ever,

women like you

make me lose faith in our power

and our sisterhood.

 

I can be silent

silence and I have a dance

we sway in and out of lanes

tapping our feet to our own ryrhmn

no one hears. we spill out extreme

parts of ourselves to random listeners.

the ones that don’t ask

any questions. didn’t you know

that curiosity killed the cat? i believe

in adages and saints. ‘Tis my foul

play and innocent coquettish way

of making men swerve their wheel.

i dropped my poems along your bank,

did you step on them?

guard them from the rain? or

disregard my blankets of faith?

i know how good girls go bad

and bad girls want to be good.

sirs and misters surround me

while i run to rivers to meet

my ocean. only 10 more months

until my poetry book is out

and I’ll be on coffee tables again.

bring the metaxa, bulleit bourbon

jack honey, it’s never been

the same

after the accident.

time to rewrite my latest novel

and get rid of all the I’s. all this love

in usb plugs astounds me

surprises me.

where are you?

I’m always waiting.

waiting for your

anticipation.

be gone feelings

and wait for

the silence to sit on my

chest.

Floating Above My Deadline

If you want fire
light up a smoke,
it’s been too long
since I inhaled
your toxic words.
I am lounging
around, letting the cold air
fill my lungs.
Dragged from one city
to another in a state
of loss. Loss of the
astute ways you nudge
my knees apart
from the outskirts
of your town. Walls restrict
and leave me to build
fondness
admiration
of your fossilized words
that can bury me
under the frozen rivers
of this province.

I dreamed that you loved me
as you were meant to,
that you spoke to me,
as you would like to,
clearly
I saw your lips move
first in front of mine
soon after they traveled
along my frontiers.

It seems uncivilized to chase
a fox
yet honeyed words
will make most women
contradict and fool
even themselves.
She should stop.
She should go.
She should stop and go.

I teach my son how to drive
how to treat a woman
how to love
how to surpass men
and reach out and touch a soul.
He can do it. I have faith.
I cross my fingers as I wait
to see if my breasts
will continue to bring me
joy or pain.
I float above all my deadlines
punching numbers
and faces of years gone by.
I suppose it is best to dig up
the skeletons
tell you
how they sleep.
Best to add mortar
to my brick walls
peek through a crack
as I fade
paint
a new landscape
from my third eye.

Old past loves
never wave good-bye.
His last true words
carved into my heart
like the couples’ initials
forever on Mont-Royal.
Ink my name
on your skin
you talk about it so often
just do it
so you can be
reminded of how
I broke your heart.
Share a drink with me
one more time
give me everything in one hour
to last
years
meet me at the corner of Rue d’Amour
and Rue Je t’adore.
It exists
somewhere
we have never been before.

raping Lana

I couldn’t finish watching it

I couldn’t understand rape balloons

and how far do we take

this fucking glamour of rape

and submission

coming from musical “artists”

who should empower women

not bear black nail polish

and streaked tears like a red dress

under the grasp

of tattooed director

hiding footage

until the right time.

Is there even a right time

to show this to the young

minds that are already

fucked up

with the garbage they

hear and see?

Take me back

to the time

when “like a virgin”

caused enough controversy

to sell records

and get me away from

raped singers

raping social media

to shreds

with hits

and its manic faces.

you think

you may think you’re all cool

and chic with your light curls

and words of pearls

but so many poets

come and go from here

with empty carts and fear

loaded in their back seat

as they head for New York

and follow the endless beat.

you may think you have it all planned out

in your lined books instant rhymes

but did you realize you’d bump into

so many poets and musicians that would

unfurl the desires of your youth

with one guitar riff

and still you write those awful poems

that I can’t read

you go on Facebook and have thousands

that follow the Christian way

the right path

so you think you’re someone

with more than just a shady past.

you think you should follow

more artists

as you pretend to be one.

I see through you

and run the other way

from girls like you

who turn into women

with fangs

and midnight pangs

to have all the men

under your wing

for all the wrong reasons.

you keep on thinking

you’re above

while the Virgo in me

walks on the ground.

Debate

So we’re sitting
and debating
raiding the liquor cabinet.
Cointreau, ice and water
ran out of juice
too many drinks
too many stories
he said/she said
reading alibis
making innuendos
media coverage
sex scandals
was it consensual?
She wanted it/ she didn’t want it
because if she liked it
and went back for more
then who are we to
say
judge
the score.

Then the rape scene
nausea, so obscene
the teddy bear
and soon all this
on SNL
to mock the man who fell.
But you know he’ll come back more popular, she says
even move to the States,
look at OJ
Allen, Cosby,
the list goes on
life continues
like nothing is wrong
with raping women
we just move right along.

Until another woman speaks up
we pass it around like the Holy Grail cup,
soon he’ll write a book
make a movie,
no end to the insanity
the mass consumption
of mixed values
lost childhoods
and dollar signs.

And the women, always the ones to get burned,

from the beginning of time
or the ones
to blame,
playing the game.

Debate never ends
as each new story
makes the rule bend.

And sometimes, I know, I’m not dumb
it’s the women that start the drum
or end it

But the men
have that strength
to the beat
and the past
creates the future
the discussion can never last
or truly end.