Chain

The music plays and dinner is in the oven
shake my ass to all the senses
jump over suburban fences
so modern men and women
don’t see me at night
up late with one burning light
is she having sex in the kitchen
black sabbath singing about
evil minds that plot destruction
and romance is kicked to another new fashion
immediate satisfaction
as long letters are forgotten
history books
politicians
speak of war
wages
increase
and I want to know
if you can feel the sunrise
and sunset as I do
or is all this talk
another way to block
the truth –
Is there more?

For sure, you perfect
the poetic muse,
know how to rhyme
the right words that fuse
mystery, need, desire
all the lust of a burning fire
between the legs
and you know how this begs
for another visit
with no time limit.

I want to see the horizon
with you
in your arms
surrounded by your undeniable charms
and all the girls and boys that ran away
from us
know that we can only give so much
board the soul up with no touch
until an inferno erupts
and the sex drive
is the only logic we strive
to aim for
to need
like an addict needs speed.

Sex and heat
close up
real and
sweet.

The night is always young for souls like us
that don’t really sleep
that live in dreams
and dream awake.
Artists know the path
to one another
is never clear cut
love the bumps
the unexpected rain
and still you see my
shimmering pants
when no one else noticed.

There was this chain
around your wrist
that I particularly stared at
for
it was touching your skin
and all the alcohol
and your eyes the colour of the tempered sky
all this did me in
so much attraction
magnets would have been jealous
the more I think about it
the more I confess.

Full Bloom

Crumpled up two pages

a rarity in my hands

most times I do not come up for air

as long as it takes a song

to start and end

as long as I make this pen bend

to my right and wrong.

I can detox my body

add ginger to my green tea

bring back my mind

with Rumi, silence and obscure poets I find.

I can revive my soul

writing until my notebooks are full

and the cardboard back cover will do

any blank space filled through and through

page after page of nonsense, raging like a bull

(you can come in and out of my room

I won’t see you, I’m in full bloom)

creating an inner world

with hotel rooms on fire

sex acts, food, conversation, attire

vivid characters’ desire

as she spreads her legs

feeds her need

with his vibrant seed.

I know the joke’s on me

of how could she write

such pornography?

Erotica from the Greek eros, I recount

and my real name

my real picture

forget it, it’s a bloody game

deconstruct me

the nature of literature

serendipity

carpe diem

in vino veritas

deux ex machina

professors’ voices reminding me

of tragedies, endings, motivations

mere words

to stop the critics, the academia, the vultures

the turds

you know who you are

and you might think you’re a star

but no one here gets out alive

and if you haven’t heard Jim say

it then get back to the past

listen without judging

take that fucking dive. 

Tell him a tale

wipe a tear

off I sail

do not leave any tracks

hard to tell the lies from the facts.

All I know is that I’m in full bloom. 

At the curb again

I’m trying
but when those words
invade my head
I don’t care about making
the bed
I’m doing it all
but when I need to explode
the bomb inside
I forget the clothes, miss my ride
try to breathe the air
detox the smoke
but my lungs healed
ready for more than a toke
they need the Pain
to exhale the runaway train
in my fucked up brain.

In front of the church
pounding on the keys
blasting Serena
had to stop
turn on the hazards
shut it out
feel the words
in my gut
deep in the wounds
be the Invisible girl
at the gallery in Paris
I could be the perfect mannequin
displayed at Ogilvy’s
pointing fingers
making me a Hero
while I avoid the cameras
and government
with their bullshit promises.
I did it on my own
I don’t ask for help
a fool for everyone again
with hope in my eyes
and anguish in the deepest parts of my soul
for what I lost
the day I found myself again.

I am stopped at a red light
and I find the source that illuminates me
It’s you all over again
I am still
I promise to be that good girl
lilacs in bloom
in the throes of gloom
of your light track
across my heart.
I’m never mad at you
I want you right here between
my lies.

Chasing the honey moon

He once brought me so high
I swear I could have touched the sky
then he murdered me piece by piece
left my heart for last
I actually did lay on the floor
my sex in the grips of his hand
moaning his name
crying as he fled out the door
proclaiming how he would always love me
but I leave him no other choice
I can’t use only lust on him
he wants me to give him
that part I hold on to
so desperately.

Under the honey moon
I take a drive with the kids
yelling to find it , where is it,
but my smart son says it’s cloudy
can’t see it, I guess you’ll have to
wait another hundred years
and I want to stop the tears
but I can’t
stupid fucking moon I say
and they laugh and know
to watch me carefully
because I will get lost
on the same road
thinking of you.
They know they shouldn’t ask
why I want to find it so badly
I wish I had the answer as well
but it leaves me empty inside
sticking my head out the window
I only see grey
and taste the acid rain on my lips
blending perfectly with my tears.

Play me a song from your phone
I tell my son
but he’s into Rush this week
no, go back
and he is the only one
who knows the playlist of my heart
let’s start with Dreams
he tells me.
Now the dark grey skies mean no harm
It’s in my head I tell myself
as Van Halen plays
but
Plath’s words hit me right then and there
and I repeat them
There’s no way out of the mind.