Fall apart

I’m holding on

only to

fall apart

over and over

until all

my limits

are made

into poetry.

Until all my body parts

turn into your leaves

of grass.

This is my sanctuary.

How I love your roots

that pull my gravity

toward your earth.

All the steps

to your street

are silent.

You know how

to hurt me

with no dirt.

I sent you my love

in a sealed package

you ripped through me

instead of opening me

up gently.

Who cares where i live?

My middle-aged craze

I have never changed

I have always been in crisis.

i flushed my cigarettes

broke all the bottles

all I have

is this pen

and paper.

Most of the time

it’s all I need.

other times

it’s what

I hate the most.

June second

the lights are red, but i want to go up

into the sky. drive right through

the pink and purple all night long.

this is my porn. you text me

your naughty, i’ll dream

in the fucking clouds. it’s june

second, two thousand and fifteen,

remember the 80’s? i relive them.

another full moon? do you

really care all that much? stop

howling. i feel it in every cell.

you’re fucked up.

I think my imagination

is so wild

even you

would run away.

but, you stay, you

make me believe

that the sunset

was a masterpiece

and the darkness

its palette.

the moon controls us

like love, we’re

helpless

to its pulling effect.

catch me tonight at

nine pm…its’ my son’s

award ceremony,

but i’ll still be falling

from the sky.

don’t forget to look up

and extend your arms,

even if you don’t see me.

voices

i woke up to the voices again

after all that drinking and St-Henri parking

in front of the usual side streets

with bearded hipsters

open door lofts

stolen dreams. Coming out

of Cayenne and Pepper

sexy shoes and leather.

i don’t know what i was

thinking when we had those

shots, those drinks,

wine, and i didn’t smash

into you at the street

corner, looking like

quite the classy whore,

there was some white lace too

enough of it to want to see

underneath. no more questions

about my ass

my poems

just listen to my voices,

or ignore me.

it’s what you do best.

i ran out of cream

have to always catch myself

as I fall. my arms

are comforting

my words free me,

it’s the only way

to breathe from the place

you make it hard to breathe from.

what distance? you’re here,

what time? you’re on it,

what sky? you’re staring at it,

what sex? we did it.

did you have enough of me?

trust me, i know,

i have had just about enough

of myself too. i can’t blame you

for leaving me, i wanted it,

it’s my island

i want to be alone

on it.

I was asked

I do not read minds

but have paid others

to tell me where my jacket is,

the size of the sword

above my shoulder,

the scent of the candle

you lit in my absence. When I die

I will come back, I know I am

one of those that linger, watch,

observe the present

for signs of the past,

think of the future

for split seconds.

I can be such a tart, a well-balanced

meal,

a sour drink

your favorite slice of cheesecake-

you be the warm apples

and I will be the pie.

Top us off with the universe’s ice

cream and dabble in bizarre

metaphors

while I am drunk off caffeine.

Yes, too much of it

and hence the trivia questions,

the sleeves of tattoos

with no meanings.

Angels have no wings

even if you call me one

I know you poke fun

with your poker face. Lies

are convincing,

deceit a shaded charcoal

of my first art class. Yes,

I rode a motorcycle

and was that girl, with a sketchpad

and a journal.

I was asked to write

a poem

about myself

where

nothing is true

I do that already,

I replied.

I lectured on Canadian Literature

I have done more

than you googled

or is written

so much goes unwritten

unsaid

announced

so much is detached

from this microscopic world

of fine hairs.

I leave mine messy

and forget my brush

on purpose.

What happened

to all those questions

you never asked?

My first amazon review by Christine M. Sepe

http://www.amazon.com/review/R37ZOYSLXPGZVO/ref=cm_cr_dp_title?ie=UTF8&ASIN=B00U2XYHRM&channel=detail-glance&nodeID=133140011&store=digital-text

Thank you Chrissi for your amazing review. I am really humbled and touched that you liked it that much. Reading it was kind of surreal and I kept on thinking is she talking about me? Weird and exciting to read it just because you actually got most of the nuances and enjoyed the sex scenes, which I loved writing. My second book will knock you off your feet and be full of erotic scenes. Got to get to that so back soon.

Shout out to her blog:

http://chrissibliss.blogspot.ca/

Enjoy your day lovely people of the blog world.

Christina

March 10: My book release

To my followers and the amazing people I love to read,

Tomorrow is the day my book comes out. Above is the link to amazon and below is my blurb.

Blurb:

It was love at first sight when Maria met Jack on a beach all those years ago. But when Jack suddenly disappears, Maria is thrust closer to Hunter, their long-time friend, taking them on a journey that changes all three of their lives forever.

Maria is a lonely young woman who finds love and acceptance with Jack, a free spirited musician. In Maria, Jack finally has the girl of his dreams by his side. When Jack introduces Maria to his best friend, Hunter, he feels an instant connection to Maria, but he buries his feelings—along with his secret that he’s a vampire—for the love of his friend.

Set in Saint-Tropez, Crush is a vampire tale with a twist. Spanning decades and delving into the past of each character in this thorny love triangle, it is about a woman who must choose between the man she’s in love with and the man who is her soul mate. Adventure, love, romance, and vampires all collide in this unique novel filled with powerful emotion, heartbreak, and the question of undying love.

I never thought this day would come. I have self-published with a co-author a trilogy, and yes, holding your book in your hand is exciting, but this ebook is my own project and thanks to MuseItUp Publishing I can easily say that my dream of publishing my own book has come true.

Thank you dear readers and writers so much for reading and following. Your support means the world to me.

Christina

Crush

My new cover for my book is out. Tell me what you think!
Thanks so much for all your support.
Book will be out in October.
Big virtual hugs from Montreal.
Christina

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Alexios & Elysia #19

“What do you mean, ‘just as you thought?'” I jumped back into my seat from the force of the smash and Tommy’s words.

He completely ignored my question. “Stay here. Lock the door. I’m going outside.” He said in a firm voice, placing his hand inside his jacket pocket to check for something. He closed the door behind him and although I tried to see what was going on, I couldn’t because the windows were foggy. I knew Alexios was out there. It had to be him.

Tommy tricked me. I wouldn’t go to his place so he tried to get Alexios to come to us. He knew Alexios was following us from the ballet.

I heard a banging against the car. They were fighting now. I felt anxious and my mouth became dry. One of them was going to die tonight. My heart beat so fast. I couldn’t breathe in the car.

I didn’t want neither Alexios nor Tommy to die. I unlocked the door.

I was going to stop them.

Alexios & Elysia #18

18.

“He fell for it, alright,” Tommy said grinning like a spoiled brat who always gets what he want. It irked me.

“I guess so,” I muttered.

“Did you make lover-boy upset? Too fuckin’ bad. I don’t even understand how a smart, beautiful girl like you, could fall for a blood-sucker?”

“Listen, Tommy, just fuck off!” I shouted. “Take me home.”

“No, the night is much too young,” he gave me a quick glance, while fumbling for music, “plus, he’s following us.”

“But I made a renez-vous for tomorrow.”

“It doesn’t really matter.” His eyes were on the rear-view mirror, giving up on his music.

“Yes, it does. It does to me.”

“You have to come to my place. That’ll make him angry!” he smirked.

“That wasn’t the plan.” I said pissed off.

“Plans change.” His expression was blank. He was cold as ice, fuming. “I want to kiss him tonight!”

I felt uneasy, uncomfortable in this plan. I didn’t want Alexios dead…my thoughts kept on changing on me.

“I don’t care if you still have feelings for that dead fuck.”

“Stop reading my mind!” I screamed at him.

“Okay, okay, calm down.”

“No, you calm down.” I repeated.

He blasted the music like an angry teenager. It was some stupid dance song on the radio. After a minute, he shut off the music and turned to me.

“Ellie, do you want him to kill more woman?”

“No, of course not.”

“You know killing is what he does best. He is a killer.”

“So are you.” I said.

“I’m a vampire killer. That’s completely different. I don’t kill innocent people, especially women.”

“This is so fucked up.”

He slowed down the car and parked at the side of the road. He shifted his body toward me. The street was vacant, no cars in front or behind. I figured he probably lost Alexios or something.

“Listen, Ellie, I don’t want you to get hurt,” Tommy looked into my eyes and then he rubbed his head s if he had a headache. I studied him closely. His blue eyes flickered on me. “You are so difficult. You are truly stubborn, and I think that is what I like most about you.” He leaned in toward me. I didn’t move, waiting to hear what he was going to say next. “When all this is over, I want to take you on a real date.”

“Are you seriously coming onto me?”

“Yes,” he whispered and placed his hand in my hair. “Yes, I am. I’ve never met anybody like you.” I felt electricity storm through me. I liked the way his hand was caressing my hair. “You make me so angry one minute and the next minute I want to kiss you. I want to kiss you like you’ve never been kissed before.”

I looked at his lips beckoning me and his voice tingling through my body. I felt the exact same way, but I didn’t want to admit it.

“I want to kiss you right now,” he said and looked at my lips, gently caressing the side of my cheek and slowly moving his fingertips over my mouth. I was melting at his touch, entrapped by his magnetic blue eyes. I didn’t pull back. I waited. He took his other hand and stroked my other cheek, pulling me closer to him. “So can I?” he mumbled.

“Stop talking,” I managed to say and with one slow movement his mouth was on mine and his hands were in my hair, holding my head tightly. I felt the urgency in his kiss and reciprocated my need. He pulled me closer to him, but the gear shift got in the way and I instinctively jumped over it and landed on top of him in the driver’s seat. His hands grabbed my ass and pulled up my dress. I felt my insides exploding and then I heard a crash from the back of the car. I bolted upright. Tommy looked behind me and said, “Alexios is here, just as I thought he would be.”