I thought maybe you were different
but anybody can say anything with conviction
tell you that you are the most beautiful
the most talented poet
that your words speak to my soul
and everything you never believed in
becomes some ethereal proof.
There is not enough
water under the bridge
to forget how her lies
twisted me up
and left me vomiting up my guts
on words, on hatred
on putrid ideologies
of muses that do not exist.
I give too much benefit of the doubt
when I am not even a lawyer.
She can eat you up and spit you out
she can see how a and b equals
her own fucked up perceptions,
the people I once loved
still love me back,
still want me,
ask to be forgiven at funeral parlors
through silent texts,
by changing how their darkness
strengthened their light.
But no need to search for you anymore,
download any app you want
you will never see my name there again,
someone who is toxic
someone who is a devil in disguise of an angel
is the fruit that spoils.
Change your name again
create a multitude of accounts
I am still me
no one can break through again.
women like you
make me lose faith in our power
and our sisterhood.