When I’m not in the mood to write
I need that time alone
to talk to my soul
and listen to its wounds
its knowledge
it is very sneaky
smart, it has this way
of rattling me from the inside.
It can bring a man like you
too close
it talks to keyboards
walls
empty wineglasses
and most importantly
it talks to you.
You gave me what I needed
I am such a slut indeed
going over the edge
too soon
skipping meals
news
doorbells
and still I wanted you
so desperately
especially when you forgot me
or first noticed me
or first saw me dancing
all those years ago
condemn me
prosecute my beliefs
burn my thoughts
make me your gravity
pull me down
so far down
I’ll stop breathing
as I feel your tongue
inside my mouth.

2 thoughts on “not in the mood

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